The Dead Joke And The Funny Man

Long years ago, a funny man,
    Flushed with a strange delight,
Sat down and wrote a funny thing
    All in the solemn night;
And as he wrote he clapped his hands
    And laughed with all his might.
    For it was such a funny thing,
    O, such a very funny thing,
    This wonderfully funny thing,
    He
    Laughed
        Outright.

And so it was this funny man
    Printed this funny thing -
Forgot it, too, nor ever thought
    It worth remembering,
Till but a day or two ago.
    (Ah! what may changes bring!)
    He found this selfsame funny thing
    In an exchange - "O, funny thing!"
    He cried, "You dear old funny thing!"
    And
    Sobbed
        Outright.

James Whitcomb Riley

James Whitcomb Riley was an American writer, poet, and best-selling author. He was known as the "Hoosier Poet" and the "Children's Poet" for his dialect works and children's poetry respectively. Over his career, Riley authored approximately 1,000 poems, including "Little Orphant Annie" and "The Raggedy Man". His influence extended into the 20th century, and his works continued to be celebrated for their nostalgic and rural themes.

James Whitcomb Riley

September Dark.

James Whitcomb Riley, Simple Poetry

The Boys

James Whitcomb Riley, Simple Poetry

As My Uncle Used To Say.

James Whitcomb Riley, Simple Poetry

The Old Home By The Mill.

James Whitcomb Riley, Simple Poetry

English

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The Funny Little Fellow

'Twas a Funny Little Fellow
Of the very purest type,
For he had a heart as mellow
As an apple over-ripe;
And the brightest little twinkle
When a funny thing occurred,
And the lightest little tinkle
Of a laugh you ever heard!

His smile was like the glitter
Of the sun in tropic lands,
And his talk a sweeter twitter
Than the swallow understands;
Hear him sing - and tell a story -
Snap a joke - ignite a pun, -
'Twas a capture - rapture - glory,
And explosion - all in one!

Though he hadn't any money -
That condiment which tends
To make a fellow "honey"
For the palate of his friends; -
Sweet simples he compounded -
Sovereign antidotes for sin
Or taint, - a faith unbounded
That his friends were genuine.

He was...

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Old Chums

"If I die first," my old chum paused to say,
    "Mind! not a whimper of regret: - instead,
    Laugh and be glad, as I shall. - Being dead,
I shall not lodge so very far away
But that our mirth shall mingle. - So, the day
    The word comes, joy with me." "I'll try," I said,
    Though, even speaking, sighed and shook my head
And turned, with misted eyes. His roundelay
Rang gaily on the stair; and then the door
    Opened and - closed. . . . Yet something of the clear,
    Hale hope, and force of wholesome faith he had
Abided with me - strengthened more and more. -
    Then - then they brought his broken body here:
    And I laughed - whisperingly - and we were glad.

James Whitcomb Riley

Jim

He was jes a plain ever'-day, all-round kind of a jour.,
Consumpted-Iookin' - but la!
The jokeiest, wittiest, story-tellin', song-singin', laughin'est, jolliest
Feller you ever saw!
Worked at jes coarse work, but you kin bet he was fine enough in his talk,
And his feelin's too!
Lordy! Ef he was on'y back on his bench ag'in to-day, a- carryin' on
Like he ust to do!

Any shopmate'll tell you there never was, on top o' dirt,
A better feller'n Jim!
You want a favor, and couldn't git it anywheres else -
You could git it o' him!
Most free-heartedest man thataway in the world, I guess!
Give up ever' nickel he's worth -
And ef you'd a-wanted it, and named it to him, and it was his,
He'd a-give you the earth!

Allus a reachin' out, Jim was, and a-he'ppin' som...

James Whitcomb Riley

Mr. What's-His-Name.

They called him Mr. What's-his-name:
From where he was, or why he came,
Or when, or what he found to do,
Nobody in the city knew.

He lived, it seemed, shut up alone
In a low hovel of his own;
There cooked his meals and made his bed,
Careless of all his neighbors said.

His neighbors, too, said many things
Expressive of grave wonderings,
Since none of them had ever been
Within his doors, or peered therein.

In fact, grown watchful, they became
Assured that Mr. What's-his-name
Was up to something wrong - indeed,
Small doubt of it, we all agreed.

At night were heard strange noises there,
When honest people everywhere
Had long retired; and his light
Was often seen to burn all night.

He left his house but seldom - the...

James Whitcomb Riley

Joney

Had a hare-lip - Joney had:
Spiled his looks, and Joney knowed it:
Fellers tried to bore him, bad -
But ef ever he got mad,
He kep' still and never showed it.
'Druther have his mouth all pouted
And split up, and like it wuz,
Than the ones 'at laughed about it.
Purty is as purty does!

Had to listen ruther clos't
'Fore you knowed "what he wuz givin'
You; and yet, without no boast,
Joney he wuz jest the most
Entertainin' talker livin'!
Take the Scriptur's and run through 'em,
Might say, like a' auctioneer,
And 'ud argy and review 'em
'At wuz beautiful to hear!

Hare-lip and inpediment,
Both wuz bad, and both ag'in' him -
But the old folks where he went,
'Preared like, knowin' his intent,
'Scused his mouth fer what wuz in h...

James Whitcomb Riley

Comic Miseries

My dear young friend, whose shining wit
    Sets all the room a-blaze,
Don't think yourself a "happy dog,"
    For all your merry ways;
But learn to wear a sober phiz,
    Be stupid, if you can,
It's such a very serious thing
    To be a funny man!

You're at an evening party, with
    A group of pleasant folks, -
You venture quietly to crack
    The least of little jokes, -
A lady doesn't catch the point,
    And begs you to explain -
Alas for one that drops a jest
    And takes it up again!

You're talking deep philosophy
    With very special force,
To edify a clergyman
    With suitable discourse, -
You think you've got him - when he calls
    A friend across the way,
And begs you'll say that funny thing
    You...

John Godfrey Saxe I