Edward Woodley Bowling

    Wish ye, sons of Alma Mater,
        Long lost laurels to replace?
    Listen to a stout old Pater,
        Once renowned in many a race.
    Now, alas!    I'm fat and forty,
        And my form grows round to view;
    And my nose is rather "porty;"
        But my heart is still light-blue.

    'Tis as bad as an emetic,
        E'en my 'baccy I refuse,
    When I hear that sports athletic
        Interfere with Cambridge crews.
    Once a Grecian runner famous
        Scorned to fight his country's foes;
    And to Greece, as some to Camus,
        Caused innumerable woes.

    When I hear the voice parental
        Cry, "my youngster shall not row!"
    Then my wrath is transcendental,
        Then my words with vigour flow.

    Woe, woe is me! for whither can I fly?
    Where hide me from Mathesis' fearful eye?
    Where'er I turn the Goddess haunts my path,
    Like grim Megoera in revengeful wrath:
    In accents wild, that would awake the dead,
    Bids me perplexing problems to unthread;
    Bids me the laws of x and y to unfold,
    And with "dry eyes" dread mysteries behold.
    Not thus, when blood maternal he had shed,
    The Furies' fangs Orestes wildly fled;
    Not thus Ixion fears the falling stone,
    Tisiphone's red lash, or dark Cocytus' moan.
    Spare me, Mathesis, though thy foe I be,
    Though at thy altar ne'er I bend the knee,
    Though o'er thy "Asses' Bridge" I never pass,
    And ne'er in this respect will prove an ass;
    Still let mild...

    'Tis done!    Henceforth nor joy nor woe
        Can make or mar my fate;
    I gaze around, above, below,
        And all is desolate.
    Go, bid the shattered pine to bloom;
        The mourner to be merry;
    But bid no ray to cheer the tomb
        In which my hopes I bury!

    I never thought the world was fair;
        That 'Truth must reign victorious';
    I knew that Honesty was rare;
        Wealth only meritorious.
    I knew that Women might deceive,
        And sometimes cared for money;
    That Lovers who in Love believe
        Find gall as well as honey.

    I knew that "wondrous Classic lore"
        Meant something most pedantic;
    That Mathematics were a bore,
        And Morals un-romantic.<...

    [NOTE. - The following lines were written by request, to be read at a Meeting of the "Girls' Friendly Society."]


    What should a maiden be?    Pure as the rill,
    Ere it has left its first home in the hill;
    Thinking no evil, suspecting no guile,
    Cherishing nought that can harm or defile.

    What should a maiden be?    Honest and true,
    Giving to God and to neighbour their due;
    Modest and merciful, simple and neat,
    Clad in the white robe of innocence sweet.

    What should a maiden be?    She should be loath
    Lightly to give or receive loving troth;
    But when her faith is once plighted, till breath
    Leave her, her love should be stronger than death.

    What should a maiden be?    Merry, whene'er
    Merr...

    O BEATA SOLITUDO; O SOLA BEATITUDO.

    (Inscription in the Grounds of Burg Birseck, near Basel.)


    Sweet Solitude where dost thou linger?
        When and where shall I look in thy face?
    Feel the soft magic touch of thy finger,
        The glow of thy silent embrace?
    Stern Civilization has banished
        Thy charms to a region unknown;
    The spell of thy beauty has vanished -
        Sweet Solitude, where hast thou flown?

    I have sought thee on pampas and prairie,
        By blue lake and bluer crevasse,
    On shores that are arid and airy,
        Lone peak, and precipitous pass.
    I have sought thee, sweet Solitude, ever
        Regardless of peril and pain;
    But in spite of my utmost endeavour
...

    There once was a time when I revelled in rhyme, with Valentines deluged my cousins,

    Translated Tibullus and half of Catullus, and poems produced by the dozens.

    Now my tale is nigh told, for my blood's running cold, all my laurels lie yellow and faded.

    "We have come to the boss;" [1] like a weary old hoss, poor Pegasus limps, and is jaded.

    And yet Mr. Editor, like a stern creditor, duns me for this or that article,

    Though he very well knows that of Verse and of prose I am stripped to the very last particle.

    What shall I write of?    What subject indite of? All my vis viva is failing;

    Emeritus sum; Mons Parnassus is dumb, and my prayers to the Nine unavailing. -

    Thus in vain have I often attempted to soft...

    "Up the high Alps, perspiring madman, steam,
    To please the school-boys, and become a theme."
            Cf. Juv. Sat. x, v. 106.


    We who know not the charms of a glass below Zero,
    Come list to the lay of an Alpine Club hero;
    For no mortal below, contradict it who can,
    Lives a life half so blest as the Alpine Club man.

    When men of low tastes snore serenely in bed,
    He is up and abroad with a nose blue and red;
    While the lark, who would peacefully sleep in her nest,
    Wakes and blesses the stranger who murders her rest.

    Now blowing their fingers, with frost-bitten toes,
    The joyous procession exultingly goes;
    Above them the glaciers spectral are shining,
    But onward they march undismay'd, un...

A lay sung in the Temple of Minerva Girtanensis.


[NOTE. - On Thursday, February 24th, 1881, three Graces were submitted to the Senate of the University of Cambridge, confirming the Report of The Syndicate appointed June 3rd, 1880, to consider four memorials relating to the Higher Education of Women.    The first two Graces were passed by majorities of 398 and 258 against 32 and 26 respectively; the third was unopposed.    The allusions in the following lay will probably be understood only by those who reside in Cambridge; but it may be stated that Professor Kennedy, Professor Fawcett, and Sir C. Dilke gave their votes and influence in favour of The Graces, while Dr. Guillemard, Mr. Wace, Mr. Potts, Professor Lumby, Dr. Perowne, Mr. Horne and Mr. Hamblin Smith voted against The Graces.]


    I
<...

    A's my new policy called Annexation;
    B is the Bother it causes the nation.
    C is Lord Chelmsford, engaged with Zulus;
    D the Disasters which give me 'the blues.'
    E is the Effort I make to look merry;
    F is my Failure - deplorable very!
    G is Sir Garnett, alas, not ubiquitous!
    H stands for H -    - t, an M.P. iniquitous.
    I stands for India, a source of vexation:
    J are the Jews, a most excellent nation.
    K is the Khedive, whose plan is to borrow
    L L. s. d. - I'll annex him to-morrow!
    M's the Majority, which I much prize;
    N are the Non-contents whom I despise.
    O's the Opposition, so often defeated;
    P is P -    - ll, that Home-ruler conceited.
    Q are the Questions put by noble Lords;
    R m...

    I made an ascent of the Eiger
        Last year, which has ne'er been surpassed;
    'Twas dangerous, long, and laborious,
        But almost incredibly fast.
    We started at twelve from the Faulberg;
        Ascended the Monch by the way;
    And were well at the base of our mountain,
        As the peak caught the dawn of the day.

    In front of me Almer and Perren
        Cut steps, each as big as a bucket;
    While behind me there followed, as Herren,
        George, Stephen, and Freshfield, and Tuckett.
    We got to the top without trouble;
        There halted, of course, for the view;
    When clouds, sailing fast from the southward,
        Veiled over the vault of dark blue.

    The lightning shone playfully round us;
       ...

 

  

   
OXFORD.
   
CAMBRIDGE.
  
  

   
1. R. T. RAIKES.
   
1. J. STILL.
  
  

   
2. F. CROWDER.
   
2. J. R. SELWYN.
  
  

   
3. W. FREEMAN.
   
3. J. A. BOURKE.
  
  

   
4. F. WILLAN.
   
4. J. FORTESCUE.
  
  

   
5. E. F. HENLEY.
   
5. D. F. STEVENSON.
  
  

   
6. W. W. WOOD.
   
6. R. A. KINGLAKE.
  
  

   
7. H. P. SENHOUSE.
   
7. H. WATNEY.
  
  

   
8. M. BROWN.
   
8. W. R. GRIFFITHS.
  
  

   
Steerer - C. R. W. TOTTENHAM.
   
Steerer - A. FORBES.
  
 



    Attend, all ye who wish to see the names
            of...

    A's Aristides, or Gladstone the Good;
    B is Lord B., whom I'd crush if I could.
    C are Conservatives, full of mad pranks;
    D are the Dunces who fill up their ranks.
    E stands for Ewelme, of some notoriety;
    F for the Fuss made in Oxford society.
    G stands for Gladstone, a hewer of wood;
    H is my Hatchet of merciless mood.
    I is the Irish Church which I cut down:
    J are the Jobs which I kill with a frown,
    K are the Knocks which I give and I take:
    L are the Liberals whom I forsake.
    M are the Ministry whom I revile;
    N are the Noodles my speeches beguile.
    O is the Office I mean to refuse:
    P is the Premier - I long for his shoes.
    Q are the Qualms of my conscience refined;
    R is the Rhetoric nothing ...

    1. HAWKSHAW    3rd Trinity.            
    2. PIGOTT        Corpus.                        
    3. WATSON        Pembroke.                    
    4. HAWKINS        Lady Margaret.        
    5. KINGLAKE    3rd Trinity.
    6. BORTHWICK    1st Trinity.
    7. STEAVENSON    Trinity Hall.
    8. SELWYN        3rd Trinity.
                    Steerer, ARCHER, Corpus.


    BEFORE THE RACE.

    Come, list to me, who wish to hear the glories of our crew,
    I'll tell you all the names of those who wear the Cambridge Blue.
    First HAWKSHAW comes, a stalwart bow, as tough as oak, nay tougher;
    Look at him ye who wish to see the Antipodes to "duffer."
    Swift as the Hawk in airy flight, strong as the guardsman SHAW,
    We men of mortal muscles...

    May, 1863.

    1. BOYCOTT, W.                        
    2. FERGUSON, R. S.                
    3. BOWLING, E. W.                
    4. SMITH, JASON.                    
    5. PALEY, G. A.
    6. GORST, P. F.
    7. SECKER, J. H.
    8. FISHER, J.
    
                        Steerer - BUSHELL, W. D.

    Eight B.A.'s stout from town came out M.A. degrees to take,
    And made a vow from stroke to bow a bump or two to make.
    Weary were they and jaded with the din of London town,
    And they felt a tender longing for their long-lost cap and gown.
    So they sought the old Loganus: well pleased, I trow, was he,
    The manly forms he knew so well once more again to see:
    And they cried - "O old Loganus, can'st thou find us e...

    Mille venit variis florum Dea nexa coronis:
        Scena ioci morem liberioris habet.

    OV. FAST. IV. 945, 946.


    I wish that the May Term were over,
        That its wearisome pleasures were o'er,
    And I were reclining in clover
        On the downs by a wave-beaten shore:
    For fathers and mothers by dozens,
        And sisters, a host without end,
    Are bringing up numberless cousins,
        Who have each a particular friend.

    I'm not yet confirmed in misogyny -
        They are all very well in their way -
    But my heart is as hard as mahogany,
        When I think of the ladies in May.
    I shudder at each railway-whistle,
        Like a very much victimized lamb;
    For I know that the carriages bristl...

    Year after year, as Summer suns come round,
    Upon the Calais packet am I found:
    Thence to Geneva hurried by express,
    I halt for breakfast, bathe, and change my dress.
    My well-worn knapsack to my back I strap;
    My Alpine rope I neatly round me wrap;
    Then, axe in hand, the diligence disdaining,
    I walk to Chamonix, by way of training.
    Arrived at Coutlet's Inn by eventide,
    I interview my porter and my guide:
    My guide, that Mentor who has dragg'd full oft
    These aching, shaking, quaking limbs aloft;
    Braved falling stones, cut steps on ice-slopes steep,
    That I the glory of his deeds might reap.
    My porter, who with uncomplaining back
    O'er passes, peaks, and glaciers bears my pack:
    Tho' now...

    When the shades of eve descending
        Throw o'er cloistered courts their gloom,
    Dimly with the twilight blending
        Memories long forgotten loom.
    From the bright fire's falling embers
        Faces smile that smiled of yore;
    Till my heart again remembers
        Hopes and thoughts that live no more.

    Then again does manhood's vigour
        Nerve my arm with iron strength;
    As of old when trained with rigour
        We beat Oxford by a length.
    Once again the willow wielding
        Do I urge the flying ball;
    Till "lost ball" the men who're fielding
        Hot and weary faintly call.

    Then I think of hours of study,
        Study silent as the tomb,
    Till the rays of morning ruddy
        ...

    1. WATNEY        Lady Margaret.        
    2. BEEBEE        Lady Margaret.        
    3. PIGOTT        Corpus                        
    4. KINGLAKE    3rd Trinity.            
    5. STEAVENSON    Trinity Hall
    6. BORTHWICK    1st Trinity.
    7. GRIFFITHS    3rd Trinity.
    8. LAWES        3rd Trinity.
                    Steerer, ARCHER, Corpus.


    One night, as I silently wandered
        By Cam's slow meandering stream,
    And many things mentally pondered,
        I saw, as it were in a dream,
    A black head emerge from the billows,
        A broad body swim through the flood,
    Till, beneath the o'ershadowing willows,
        It sank gently down in the mud.

    All alone - as a Scholar of Tyrwhitt
        Whe...