Henry Leigh

Nay, I cannot come into the garden just now,
    Tho' it vexes me much to refuse:
But I must have the next set of waltzes, I vow,
    With Lieutenant de Boots of the Blues.

I am sure you'll be heartily pleas'd when you hear
    That our ball has been quite a success.
As for me, I've been looking a monster, my dear.
    In that old-fashion'd guy of a dress.

You had better at once hurry home, dear, to bed;
    It is getting so dreadfully late.
You may catch the bronchitis or cold in the head
    If you linger so long at our gate.

Don't be obstinate, Alfy; come, take my advice,
    For I know you're in want of repose:
Take a basin of gruel (you'll find it so nice),
    And remember to tallow your nose.

No, I tell you I can't ...

Oh, the days were ever shiny
    When I ran to meet my love;
When I press'd her hand so tiny
    Through her tiny tiny glove.
Was I very deeply smitten?
    Oh, I loved like anything!
But my love she is a kitten,
    And my heart's a ball of string.

She was pleasingly poetic,
    And she loved my little rhymes;
For our tastes were sympathetic,
    In the old and happy times.
Oh, the ballads I have written,
    And have taught my love to sing!
But my love she is a kitten,
    And my heart's a ball of string.

Would she listen to my offer,
    On my knees I would impart
A sincere and ready proffer
    Of my hand and of my heart.
And below her dainty mitten
    I would fix a wedding ring,
But my love she is a kitten...

In form and feature, face and limb,
    I grew so like my brother,
That folks got taking me for him,
    And each for one another.
It puzzled all our kith and kin,
    It reach'd an awful pitch;
For one of us was born a twin,
    Yet not a soul knew which.

One day (to make the matter worse),
    Before our names were fix'd,
As we were being wash'd by nurse
    We got completely mix'd;
And thus, you see, by Fate's decree,
    (Or rather nurse's whim),
My brother John got christen'd me,
    And I got christen'd him.

This fatal likeness even dogg'd
    My footsteps when at school,
And I was always getting flogg'd,
    For John turned out a fool.
I put this question hopelessly
    To every one I knew,
What