Paul Revere

Listen, Christina, and yu skol hear
'Bout midnight ride of Paul Revere.
Seventeen hundred seventy-five,
Hardly a geezer ban now alive
Who live har ven Paul ban wolunteer.

Some British fallers ban getting gay,
So Paul yust giving his horse some hay
And say, "Ay skol mak a grand-stand play!"
Den he tal Yohn Brenk, - Yohn ban his frend
Who borrow venever Paul skol lend, -
"Yohn, yust go up har in old church tower,
And, yust so sune sum yu find out hour
British skol march, give me good yal,
And ay skol hustle and ride lak hal!"

So op in the church go old Yohn Brenk, -
It ban first time in his life, ay tenk;
And, ven dese English get busy, he yal,
And vave big lantern to his gude pal,
Maester Paul Revere, who yump on mare,
And off for Lexington he skol tear.
"Yee whiz!" he say, "after dis, ay guess,
Ay skol getting my picture in Success.
Dey skol tenk ay'm smart old son of a gun
Ven I gallop into Lexington!"

Val, he mak dis ride, yu bet yure life!
And fallers grab gun and drum and fife,
And march to scrap vith dese British men.
Maester Paul ban yolly brave hero den.
And back in the church tower old Yohn Brenk
Climb from his perch, and tak gude drenk.
Val, dis ban all, Christina dear,
'Bout midnight ride of Paul Revere.

William F. Kirk

William F. Kirk was an American poet and writer, known for his humorous and satirical works. His poetry often reflected the everyday lives and struggles of ordinary people, presented in a light-hearted yet insightful manner. Kirk also wrote prose, contributing to various newspapers and magazines. His works were widely appreciated for their wit and relatability, making him a popular figure in early 20th-century American literature.

William F. Kirk

William Tell

William F. Kirk, Simple Poetry

Sheridan's Ride

William F. Kirk, Simple Poetry

Sonnet On Stewed Prunes

William F. Kirk, Simple Poetry

Excelsior

William F. Kirk, Simple Poetry

English

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Barbara Frietchie

Barbara Frietchie ban brave old hen,
Her age it ban tree score and ten.
She living in Frederick, Maryland, -
It ban yust a dinky von night stand.
But Barbara rise to fame, yu bet,
And folks ban talking about her yet.
Ef yu lak to know yust how dis ban,
Ay skol tal yu story the best ay can.

Op the street com Yen-ral Yackson,
Ay bet yu he ban a gude attraction;
For all dese Reubs skol rubber lak hal,
And some of dem calling the yen'ral "pal."
Yackson, he see dem on both sides
Shooting dis bunk to save deir hides.
Den op in vindow he see big flag,
And tenk at first he must have a yag.
No: sure enuff, it ban Union Yack.
So Stonevall stand on his horse's back,
Yell at his men. Dey shoot, von and all,
And into the gutter flag skol fall.

William F. Kirk

Sheridan's Ride

Ef yu ban vise, and ay s'pose yu ban,
Yu know 'bout Yeneral Sheridan;
But maybe yu ant remember the day
Ven he yump on horse, and den he say,
"Ay'm yust about tventy-sax miles avay."

Some rebel fallers ban start big row
In Vinchester. Ay ant know yust how,
But ay tenk dey yump on some Yankee guys,
And trying to give dem gude black eyes.
So Yeneral Sheridan hear dese guns,
And drank some coffee and eat some buns,
And tal dis har landlord, "Gude-by, Yack,
Ay skol paying my bill ven ay com back!"
Den he ride so fast that sune he say,
"Val, now ay ban saxteen miles avay!"

Dese cannons ban roaring gude and loud, -
It ban tough game for dis Yankee crowd;
And Lieut. Olson, he tal his pal,
"'Ay tank we ban due to run lak hal!"
So dey start t...

William F. Kirk

Curfew Shall Not Ring To-Night

England's sun ban slowly setting on big hilltops far avay;
Dis bar sun ban tired of standing, so it lak to set, yu say;
And yust ven dis sun ban setting, it shine hard on Yosephine;
She ban talking to the sexton, and ban feeling purty mean.
"Now," she tal him, "yust be careful,... ay skol fix it op all right;
Yust one teng ay lak to tal yu, Curfew skol not reng to-night!"

Val, the sun yust keep on setting, and the sexton start for bell.
"Vait a minute!" Yosie tal him; sexton answer, "Vat to 'ell?"
"Val," she say, "ay having sveetheart who ban over har in yail,
Ay ban vorking hard for money, nuff so ay can pay his bail;
But it ant no use to du it, and dis har old yudge skol write
That he dies ven bell start going. Curfew skol not reng to-night!"

Den, yu say, dis maeste...

William F. Kirk

Horatius At The Bridge

Horatius ban brave yentleman,
Who vatch big bridge at night:
It ban gude many years ago,
Ay ant got date yust right.
Dar ban some foxy geezers
Who march avay from home,
And tenk they having qvite gude chance
To raise some hal in Rome.

Lars Porsena ban starting it, -
Ay tenk Lars ban a Svede;
He raise 'bout tousand soldiers,
And put himself in lead.
Then he began tu marching,
And all his frends march, tu,
Till they skol come almost to Rome,
Var dey skol rest a few.

Then op spake Maester Horatius,
Captain of dis har gate:
"To every yackass on dis earth
Death coming sune or late.
So how can ay die better
Than vatching bridge, yu say?
Now who skol standing on my front
And vatching bridge vith me?"

Then Maes...

William F. Kirk

The Landlord's Tale. - Paul Revere's Ride. - The Wayside Inn - Part First

Listen, my children, and you shall hear
Of the midnight ride of Paul Revere,
On the eighteenth of April, in Seventy-five;
Hardly a man is now alive
Who remembers that famous day and year.

He said to his friend, "If the British march
By land or sea from the town to-night,
Hang a lantern aloft in the belfry arch
Of the North Church tower as a signal light,--
One, if by land, and two, if by sea;
And I on the opposite shore will be,
Ready to ride and spread the alarm
Through every Middlesex village and farm
For the country folk to be up and to arm,"

Then he said, "Good night!" and with muffled oar
Silently rowed to the Charlestown shore,
Just as the moon rose over the bay,
Where swinging wide at her moorings lay
The Somerset, British man-of-w...

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The Charge Of The Light Brigade

Yoyfully, yoyfully,
Yoyfully onvard,
In dis har walley of death
Rode the sax hundred!
It ban a cinch, ay tenk,
Some geezer blundered.
"Hustle, yu Light Brigade!
Yump!" Maester Olson said;
Den in the walley of death
Go the sax hundred.

Cannon on right of dem,
Cannon on left of dem,
Cannon on top of dem,
Wolleyed and t'undered;
Smashed vith dis shot and shal,
Dey ant do wery val;
Most of dem ketching hal, -
Nearly sax hundred!

Yes, all dem sabres bare
Flash purty gude in air;
Each faller feel his hair
Standing. No vonder!
Yudas! It ant ban yob
For any coward slob,
Fighting dis Russian mob.
Ay tenk ay vudn't stand
Yeneral's blunder.

Cannon on right of dem,
Cannon on top of dem,
Can...

William F. Kirk