Cases - Finlay V. Chirney

(20 Queen's Bench Division, 494)

    When love-sick man descends to folly
        And gets engaged, he must not stray,
    The jury takes the part of Polly,
        And if he jilts her, he must pay.

    The only way his fault to cover,
        From damages and costs to fly,
    To leave his jilted lady-lover
        Without an action is--to die![L]

[L] The decision was to the effect that in most cases an action for breach of promise of marriage does not survive against the representatives of the promiser.

James Williams

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James Williams

Cases - Mylward V. Weldon

James Williams, Simple Poetry

Cases - Willis V. The Bishop Of Oxford

James Williams, Simple Poetry

Cases - Pollard V. Photographic Company

James Williams, Simple Poetry

English

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Cases - Dashwood V. Jermyn

(12 Chancery Division, 776)

    Captain Dashwood, who had been
    In the service of the Queen,
    Sick of "Eyes front" and "Attention,"
    Came to London on his pension.
    At the "Portland" as he stayed,
    Firm the friendship that he made
    With one William Richards, who
    Put up at the "Portland" too.
    Passed six years, then he was wrapped in
    Love's embraces, vanquished captain!
    "Yes," he cried, "I will; no bar shall
    Stop my wedding Edith Marshall."
    But there was a bar, 'twas that
    He was poorer than a rat;
    Indian pensions do not run
    More than just enough for one.
    Edith, too, had not a cent,
    Who would pay the rates and rent?
    Two more years, and Richards moved
    (He perchance had ...

James Williams

How We Found Our Verdict

    We sat in the jury-box, twelve were we all,
    And the clock was just pointing to ten in the hall,
    His Lordship he bowed to the jury, and we
    Bowed back to his Lordship as gravely as he.

    The case of De Weller v. Jones was the first,
    And we all settled down and prepared for the worst
    When old Smithers, Q.C., began slowly to preach
    Of a promise of marriage and action for breach.

    A barmaid the plaintiff was, wondrous the skill
    Wherewith she was wont her tall tankards to fill,
    The defendant, a publican, sought for his bride
    Such a paragon, urged by professional pride.

    But the course of true love ran no smoother for her
    Than the Pas de Calais or the bark of a fir,
    The defendant discovered...

James Williams

Cases - Pollard V. Photographic Company

(40 Chancery Division, 345)

    "Shall I take your photograph, my pretty maid?"
    "You may if you like, kind sir," she said.

    "Do you like your photograph, my pretty maid?"
    "It is more than flattering, sir," she said.

    "I'll publish your photograph, my pretty maid."
    "Indeed but you won't, kind sir," she said.

    "As a Christmas card, my pretty maid."
    "The very idea, kind sir!" she said.

    "But what if I've done it, my pretty maid?"
    "I'll get an injunction, sir," she said.

    "The law is with you, my pretty maid,"
    The learned judge of the Chancery said.

    "You have proved the negative, my pretty maid,
    A difficult thing in law," he said.

James Williams

Cases - Ex Parte Jones

(18 Chancery Division, 109)

    Oh for the wily infant who married the widow and made
    Profit of coke and of breeze, and never a penny he paid!
    Oh for the Corporation of Birmingham cheated and snared,
    Taking orders for coke that the widow and infant prepared!
    Oh for the Court of Appeal, and oh for Lords Justices three!
    Oh for the Act that infants from contracts may shake themselves free!
    Oh for the common law with its store of things old and new!
    Birmingham coke is good and good Coke upon Littleton too.

James Williams

Cases - Hampden V. Walsh

(1 Queen's Bench Division, 189)

    "Five hundred pounds as stake I'll lay,"
    Says Hampden, "that by such a day
    No man of science proves to me
    That earth not flat but round must be;
    The earth is flat, and flats are they."
    The sum Walsh holds right willingly;
    But Wallace by philosophy
    Proves roundness, and would take away
                    Five hundred pounds.

    "Proof me no proofs," quoth Hampden, "Nay,
    Let Wallace get it if he may,
    I'll sue Walsh for it." So sues he.
    "Let Wallace," hold the judges three,
    "Take nought, let Walsh to Hampden pay
                    Five hundred pounds."

James Williams

The Judge's Song.

When I, good friends, was called to the Bar,
I'd an appetite fresh and hearty,
But I was, as many young barristers are,
An impecunious party.
I'd a swallow-tail coat of a beautiful blue
A brief which I bought of a booby
A couple of shirts and a collar or two,
And a ring that looked like a ruby!

In Westminster Hall I danced a dance,
Like a semi-despondent fury;
For I thought I should never hit on a chance
Of addressing a British Jury
But I soon got tired of third class journeys,
And dinners of bread and water;
So I fell in love with a rich attorney's
Elderly, ugly daughter.

The rich attorney, he wiped his eyes,
And replied to my fond professions:
"You shall reap the reward of your enterprise,
At the Bailey and Middlesex Sessions.

William Schwenck Gilbert