Cases - Hampden V. Walsh

(1 Queen's Bench Division, 189)

    "Five hundred pounds as stake I'll lay,"
    Says Hampden, "that by such a day
    No man of science proves to me
    That earth not flat but round must be;
    The earth is flat, and flats are they."
    The sum Walsh holds right willingly;
    But Wallace by philosophy
    Proves roundness, and would take away
                    Five hundred pounds.

    "Proof me no proofs," quoth Hampden, "Nay,
    Let Wallace get it if he may,
    I'll sue Walsh for it." So sues he.
    "Let Wallace," hold the judges three,
    "Take nought, let Walsh to Hampden pay
                    Five hundred pounds."

James Williams

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James Williams

Justinian at Windermere

James Williams, Simple Poetry

A Greek Libel

James Williams, Simple Poetry

The Minneapolis Case

James Williams, Simple Poetry

English

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Cases - Dashwood V. Jermyn

(12 Chancery Division, 776)

    Captain Dashwood, who had been
    In the service of the Queen,
    Sick of "Eyes front" and "Attention,"
    Came to London on his pension.
    At the "Portland" as he stayed,
    Firm the friendship that he made
    With one William Richards, who
    Put up at the "Portland" too.
    Passed six years, then he was wrapped in
    Love's embraces, vanquished captain!
    "Yes," he cried, "I will; no bar shall
    Stop my wedding Edith Marshall."
    But there was a bar, 'twas that
    He was poorer than a rat;
    Indian pensions do not run
    More than just enough for one.
    Edith, too, had not a cent,
    Who would pay the rates and rent?
    Two more years, and Richards moved
    (He perchance had ...

James Williams

Cases - Mylward V. Weldon

    [The plaintiff was committed to the Fleet Prison on Feb. 8, 1596, by order of the Lord Keeper, for drawing a replication of sixscore sheets containing much impertinent matter which might well have been contained in sixteen. On Feb. 10 the Lord Keeper ordered that on the following Saturday the Warden of the Fleet should cut a hole through the replication, and put the plaintiff's head through the hole and let it hang about his shoulders with the written side outwards, and lead the plaintiff bareheaded and barefaced round about Westminster Hall, and show him at the bar of all the courts, and so back to the Fleet.--Abridged from Spence's Equitable Jurisdiction, vol. i. p. 376.]

    'Gainst Weldon Mylward files a bill,
    But doth his replication fill
    With scandalous and idle matter,
    That would dis...

James Williams

Cases - Finlay V. Chirney

(20 Queen's Bench Division, 494)

    When love-sick man descends to folly
        And gets engaged, he must not stray,
    The jury takes the part of Polly,
        And if he jilts her, he must pay.

    The only way his fault to cover,
        From damages and costs to fly,
    To leave his jilted lady-lover
        Without an action is--to die![L]

[L] The decision was to the effect that in most cases an action for breach of promise of marriage does not survive against the representatives of the promiser.

James Williams

The Minneapolis Case

(Tried in Minnesota in 1892)

    Kind reader, tarry here, nor miss
    The law of Minneapolis.
    There was a carpenter called Brown,
    A citizen of that great town,
    Who stood his "inexpressive she"
    A dollar's worth of comedy.
    Was it a Gaiety burlesque,
    Or labour of Norwegian desk?
    Or did they spout in stagey tones
    Morality by H. A. Jones?
    Or tear romance to rags and set it
    In heavy platitudes by Pettit?
    I know not, and it matters not,
    The subject I have clean forgot.
    Sufficient that the pair did sit
    In expectation in the pit,
    An expectation not fulfilled,
    'Twas otherwise by fortune willed.
    Before this loving couple sat
    In solitary state a hat--
    A hat, I say, ...

James Williams

How We Found Our Verdict

    We sat in the jury-box, twelve were we all,
    And the clock was just pointing to ten in the hall,
    His Lordship he bowed to the jury, and we
    Bowed back to his Lordship as gravely as he.

    The case of De Weller v. Jones was the first,
    And we all settled down and prepared for the worst
    When old Smithers, Q.C., began slowly to preach
    Of a promise of marriage and action for breach.

    A barmaid the plaintiff was, wondrous the skill
    Wherewith she was wont her tall tankards to fill,
    The defendant, a publican, sought for his bride
    Such a paragon, urged by professional pride.

    But the course of true love ran no smoother for her
    Than the Pas de Calais or the bark of a fir,
    The defendant discovered...

James Williams

Cases - Ex Parte Jones

(18 Chancery Division, 109)

    Oh for the wily infant who married the widow and made
    Profit of coke and of breeze, and never a penny he paid!
    Oh for the Corporation of Birmingham cheated and snared,
    Taking orders for coke that the widow and infant prepared!
    Oh for the Court of Appeal, and oh for Lords Justices three!
    Oh for the Act that infants from contracts may shake themselves free!
    Oh for the common law with its store of things old and new!
    Birmingham coke is good and good Coke upon Littleton too.

James Williams